Finding Your Happy

Finally! Post number five! I hope you have learned something or found something helpful within these last few posts! The previous posts were: Chasing My Happy, The Glory of Rage Writing, Letting That Sh*t Go and Setting Your Boundaries. This is going to be an ultimate list of things to do to keep your spirits up, make you feel good and help you relax and release! Perhaps you will find your happy on here!

Ultimate list of self-care:

1. Ask for help – This is a HUGE one. I have never really been one to ask for help, ever. I understand now that one person simply cannot conquer the world by themselves. It doesn’t make you any less of a person to ask for help with the kids, with dinner, with the chores with anything. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness and no one should ever make you feel guilty for asking for help. If you need a night off to go out for drinks and dinner with your significant other or even with your friends don’t feel bad. You can’t pour from an empty cup, if a night off, weekend away, a trip to the grocery store alone… Etc…. Is what you need to recharge, then do it!
2. Remove negative people from your life – Family, old friends, asshole cashier at the store? Tell them all to kick rocks, beat feet, hit the road.. whatever suits you. It can be difficult to tell someone you love and care about that you don’t need them in your life. But if they make you feel some type of way, and that way isn’t good, then you deserve better!
3. Remember saying no is alright – Made plans to go out, but now feeling mentally under the weather? Change your plans. Saying no is empowering and totally acceptable!
4. Stay off social media – I’ve started doing this one! I’ve even started trying to stop reaching for my phone if I’m bored. There is plenty of other things that can be done! The breaks from social media and my phone have been a blessing and very refreshing!
5. Make a gratitude list – Stating what your grateful for is a great way to change your mind set. If you do it in the morning you’re whole day will be set in that tone. If you do it at night you’ll have peaceful sleep! If you find it hard to think of things to be grateful for, which for me can happen when it feels like everything has gone to shit. I try to take something bad and spin it around to a positive.
6. Read – there is nothing like a good book to cheer you up or at least help you unwind and leave stress behind. I have come to love all sorts of books here are some of fave authors!
   
   Patricia Cornwell, if you love a good crime fiction… Her books are great! Paula Brackston writes amazing magical fiction, usually period pieces…. If you want to get your witchy on… I highly suggest her! If you are into self care there is a fantastic little book called “The Book of Self Care” it’s such an easy read and has amazing advice. Something to get you pumped up? “Girl stop apologizing” by Rachel Hollis or “You Are a Badass, How To Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living and Awesome Life” by Jen Sincero are my current faves and an oldie but goodie is “Moms Who Drink and Swear” by Nicole Knepper
7. Listen to a book – If you haven’t jumped on the Audible bandwagon yet, I highly recommend it! I actually didn’t until just recently, because reading is better than listening and blah blah blah… but can you read while folding laundry, doing dishes or getting dinner done? I mean I guess you could, it would be very difficult though. You can, however, listen! Plus Audible offers a free trial period, so if you don’t like it, just cancel it!
8. Take a bath/warm shower with essential oils – essential oils are a great way to find your happy place. Letting your stress melt away with a combo like frankincense and lavender with a splash of rosemary is great! It’s also great for your skin. Throw in some Himalayan or Epsom salt and detox your worries away, just don’t stay in longer than 20-30 minutes, hydrate afterwards and enjoy the lingering smell of the oils! There are awesome shower melts that provide the same effect. You can also use a salt scrub, if baths aren’t your jam.
9. Light a candle, burn incense or diffuse oils – As humans we are very driven by smell. Have you ever been in a store, smelled something familiar and you’re instantly transported somewhere else? Try to find candles, oils or incense that remind you of joy and happiness. 
10. Try a new skin care routine – Nothing like nice soft skin to help you through the day! I’ve been using a combo of witch hazel and rose water. They are both great for cleansing and purifying!
11. Get a Mani/pedi – We do home manicures and pedicures so we aren’t spending over 100 bucks for me and the older girls to get it done. We have a mini tote of polish, and glitter and stickers and press on nails and things that I don’t even understand.
12. Try a new hair style – Hairstyle does not mean haircut! Unless you really want to shop your locks, then go for it! If you’re a classic top knot wearer like I am, maybe try a braid, or you can really shake things up and wear it all down!
13. Make a playlist – music is a big one for me. A song can take you to a different time and place. I have a few play lists that I’ve created in iTunes. Now that Apple music is available on Android devices I can take them with me anywhere!
14. Watch your favorite movie or TV show – Vegging out to some TV or movies is perfectly alright! Jacob recently got me into the Lord Of The Rings. I’m a late bloomer! I know!
15. Set a night time routine – lately this has been my go to! Willow heads for bed between 7 and 7:30, I hang out with the older two chuckle heads for a while, we are all in our rooms by 8:30. I turn my diffuser on, floss, brush, mouth wash. Wash my face with witch hazel and rose water, then lotion up. I have this kind that smells like vanilla and it is amazing! Then I journal for a little bit, watch a TV show or two and hit the hay. A night time routine is as important for adults as it is for babies. Going through the motions let’s your body know it’s time to settle down and get ready to sleep. If you’ve been having trouble sleeping I suggest this!
16. Get enough rest – That night time routine? Cut it short by 30 minutes and hit the sack a little earlier than normal. Your body and mind with thank you for the extra zzz’s. You can also take a nap, something that isn’t so easy if you have a little one running around, but you can nap when they nap, or tell your significant other to take over for a bit so you can rest.
17. Set a morning routine – Another important one! Having a good morning routine helps to set the tone for the day. I am not a morning person by any means, I wake up at 6, get the girls up for school. Let all of the dogs out, bring them all in for their breakfast. Make sure the girls have everything, send them off to school. And sometimes Willow sleeps in! So I use this time to make a cup of coffee, write a gratitude list and start breakfast. When she wakes up early we use that time for quiet time and snuggles! I need to start working on waking up earlier so I can get a rock solid hour in before any of the kids wake up!
18. Journal – I do this every night or even sometimes during the day if it has been a doozy! Even jotting down a few lines helps to clear your mind!
19. Write a short story – Create a universe or reality where whatever you can imagine is taking place.
20. Make a craft – If you are into crafting it can be very relaxing! I crochet and have attempted to knit! Getting lost in the stitches is very soothing.
21. Go for a walk – Getting your blood flowing night be just what you need. Observing nature at it’s finest, listening to nature, getting fresh air is very relaxing.
22. Go for a run – If you need something more vigorous running can do the trick!
23. Ride a bike – This one can seem intimidating because if you’re like me and haven’t ridden a bike in a long time, things could get hairy. But on the flip side it could help you connect with your carefree inner child. If nothing else laughter at trying will brighten your spirits!
24. Have a dance party – If you’ve seen my recent insta stories, you’ll see this is something we do frequently. Can I dance? Hell to the no, but is it fun? Yes it is! Especially when you turn on some gangster rap!
25. Go to the gym – Joining the gym is a great way to relieve stress! Plus most gyms offer classes, who knows, maybe lifting a tire is just what you need?
26. Do a homework out – The gym vibe isn’t your cup of tea? home work outs are cheap or free and you get the same endorphins! YouTube is filled with free workouts!
27. Yoga/stretch – Light stretching or some yoga is great for loosening up!
28. Sit in the sunshine for a while – Go absorb some vitamin D! If you live in a place where the sun doesn’t shine very often, like me, I take vitamin D supplements. It helps to even out moods and make you feel good!
29. Plant something – I have more of a grey thumb than a green thumb but I am slowly learning how to take proper care of plants!
30. Star gaze – Nothing like looking up at the billions of stars to really give you perspective.
31. Clean your room – A tidy space is much easier to get cozy in. I try to clean my room at least once a week. It takes a lot off of my mind when I crawl into bed and there isn’t clutter everywhere.
32. Set up a sacred space – A sacred space that is just for you is great because you are surrounding yourself with lots of things that center you. Crystals, oils, books, little trinkets, whatever you desire! I discovered Jessica Dimas when I was looking on Pinterest for a self care routine. The post sacred self care for sensitive moms, popped up and I’ve loved her stuff since then! Her vibe is very funky and she has a lot of good advice!
33. Clean out your cupboards – Getting rid of things you don’t use any more, or haven’t ever used is therapeutic!
34. Call a friend or family member – This is also a weekly practice, I call one of my friends or at the very least have some sort of interaction with a friend. It helps me to unwind and I can bounce ideas off of them just as they can bounce ideas off of me!
35. Pray – If you are a spiritual person, turning to whomever or whatever you believe in can often times bring guidance and comfort in times of turmoil. 
36. Meditate – Take a few deep breaths and really focus on the negative energy leaving your body with every exhale. Breath in happiness, breath out anxiety/anger. Repeat until you feel calm.
37. Sit in silence – This is something my kiddos hate. Shelby notices a quiet moment and starts chattering away. Sitting alone with your thoughts or day dreaming can help you really get to the root cause of your stress or emotional distress. It can also recharge your proverbial batteries!
38. Listen to a motivational podcast – there isn’t anything like a good pep talk to get your butt into gear!
39. Read some positive affirmations – I have a book by Louise Hay called “Heart Thoughts” and I love it dearly. There is also a free app that is on my phone called My Affirmations. It allows me to enter my own affirmations, use the preset ones, and select how often they pop up on my phone to remind me to continue being an awesome person!
40. Make a vision board – Pinterest is where vision boards can easily be made! Or you can go real old school and start cutting up those magazines in the corner that you’ve been meaning to look at!
41. Use a self care app – I just discovered this new about app called Sanity and Self! It has all sorts of goodies like guided meditation, self care reminders even a reminder to drink water!
42. Have a cup of coffee or tea – A little pick me up in the middle of the day always helps to change my mindset! I also found this cool shop a while ago on Instagram.
    
    This cool chick named Rachel Allene has a bunch of amazing stuff, and motivational mugs are her specialty! Check her out and grab yourself one! There is also a great shop called HedgeWitch Apothecary, they are a mother daughter team and they have some of the best herbal teas and coffee I’ve ever had!
43. Make a healthy meal – If you’re feeling out of sorts and your body feels sluggish a healthy meal like these that I found on Pinterest will bright your day! Nutrients are important not only for our body but also important for our minds as well!
44. Bake your favorite treat – Nothing like the smell of fresh cookies or break to take you back to Grandma’s kitchen! There are plenty of ways to put a healthy twist on old favorites!
45. Make sure you drink enough water – I tell my girls this very often! Dehydration can make you feel grumpy and tired. Drinking some water can also stave off snacking when you aren’t really hungry.
46. Host a dinner party or game night – Jacob and I used to do a lot of BBQs, everyone would bring something and we would all stay up waaaay to late! Now that we are more grown up, we still do this but are more intentional. We invite people we truly like to be around rather than inviting those that are just there because they heard the invite and we were too afraid to tell them no.
47. Try something new – This is a goal that the girls and I have, trying something new is invigorating. New food, new park, new movie, new walking route…. It’s endless! 
48. If you have kids, play pretend with them – Nothing like building a couch fort or having a sword fight with paper towel tubes… Or pool noodles, after all the couch fort must be protected at all cost!
49. Take silly pictures – Goofy photo shoots are always super fun! This is something the girls and I used to do regularly!
50. Plan a fun day out of the house – Going to the park, walking around a farmers market, a free concert, window shopping, a picnic, a hike…even if it’s just sitting in your yard for a while!
51. Go for a drive – Want to get out of town and explore some place new? Go for a drive! Crank up the tunes and see where you end up!

This list is to help you find ideas to relax and to take care of yourself. Dealing with a rough emotional state is hard on the body mind and soul. Replenishing these frequently ensure that you are always ready for anything. Frequent and proper self care are also important for you’re kids. I think it is good for them to learn how to listen to themselves to figure out what they really need. By trying new things and modeling self care practices to them, you are setting a great example! If none of these things speak to you though, do whatever makes you feel happy and feel good! Don’t forget to subscribe below!