Having Two Kids Close In Age.

I was a young single mom. Finding out I was pregnant at 19 and having my oldest when I was just barely 20 years old. When I found out I was pregnant I was still living at home, trying to figure life out. And then all of the sudden it wasn’t just my own life to figure out, it was a baby’s as well. I knew it wouldn’t be fair to bring a baby into grandma and grandpa’s house, my train of thought was they had already raised their kids and helped raise us, so I needed to set out on my own. I got my own apartment and worked two jobs, cause I’m a badass like that!

My second baby came a year and a week to the day after her big sister. I didn’t know I was pregnant when I left their … Sperm donor… For lack of a better word. Being freshly 21 and having two babies under the age of two. I was terrified to say the least. I had no idea how to take care of myself let alone two chunkers that solely depended upon me to keep them alive! Sure, I knew how to cook a few things and that babies needed a lot of work. There were plenty of warnings from others. Some people even tried to talk me into giving one of the kids up for adoption. But I knew deep down that this is where I was meant to be at that point in time.

Picture on the left (or on top for those not on a computer): Shelby-Lynn, January 31, 2006 (two days old).
Picture on the right(bottom): Emory, February 7th, 2007 (two days old).

After a moment of panic, I pulled it together, ignored the glares of the old ladies at the store, and buckled down. I learned all sorts of things in the process, and I am still learning things today! Now the older girls are about to be 12 and 13 and the little girly will be two in a few months.

Since having Willow, I have often said I forgot how hard it was having a tiny baby. Granted, I was 11 years younger and there was a lot less going on, but there was two of them then. As I was reflecting upon this, I realized there are some pretty solid advantages to having kiddos close together. Or perhaps I was just looking on the bright side!

When they are little they always had a playmate. Shelby and Emory were the best of friends. They shared everything and were always happy to be around each other. There wasn’t any toys that Shelby got that Emory couldn’t play with because of age restrictions. Emory would get toys and books that Shelby was still interested in. So the fighting over toys and books was minimal!

Mom brain is a real thing. I feel it in my soul. I feel like a mombie most days – a mom zombie! Having Shelby and Emory so close in age meant I got the general tiredness over with in one shot. There wasn’t any of the whole, the baby is asleep but the older kids want to stay up and hang out. Being so close in age meant their bed times were the same time, and they napped at the same time! Schedules were super easy, and working on milestones was also easy, because while Shelby was potty training, Emory was watching and eager to learn! Shelby did get a big kid bed first, but while Jacob and I were showing her how to sleep in her bed, Emory learned to stay in her bed once it was lights out!

When the girls were little, even right up until a few years ago. Things were very easy! We were very lucky and extremely thankful that none of the bad stuff people warned me about would happen. For example, people said they would fight, they would keep me up all hours of the night and that they would be jealous of one ankther. None of that happened, they slept well, ate well,weren’t jealous and didn’t fight at all….

Until recently! All of the rainbows and unicorns farts have gone. They fight more than they have a civil conversation. The tattling on each other for the simplest of things happens daily. Their attitudes aren’t just directed towards Jacob and I, they target each other. The name calling is insane! It is kind of incredible the change that seemed to take place over night. One moment they are hugging each other and love to be around one another, the next they want to claw each other’s eyes out. Such is the nature of the beast.

Arguments over clothes, make-up, school stuff, dinner, shoes, who’s turn it is to take their puppies for a walk…they fight about all the things ALL the time. It is almost as if they are making up for when they were little. 

When it comes to chores, they brush me off because they can’t be bothered. Unless, one of them is doing their chores they will start snapping at the other to help. Enter fight.

Their hobbies are very different, Shelby likes sports and Emory likes art. They both enjoy cooking though! So that’s a win! 

I’m still terrified most days. Moming is hard work. And I’m still trying to figure stuff out. The struggle right now is trying to get them to be friends again. While there are pluses and minuses to having these two girlies so close together, I wouldn’t change a thing. They have made me who I am today. While they are stubborn and moody, they are also kind, loving and forgiving. I know one day they will be friends again.

Sometimes when they think I’m not listening they are hanging out and talking like normal, even laughing! That gives me hope for the future and makes my heart happy! Don’t forget to subscribe down below!